The Things No One Tells You About the People Who Show Up

When disappointment gives way to gratitude

There are some lessons in life that no one really prepares us for.

One of those lessons is how much our relationships can change when our lives change.

When we walk through grief, illness, loss, or any difficult season, we naturally have expectations.

We expect certain people to call.

We expect certain people to check in.

We expect certain people to simply…be there.

And when they aren’t, if we’re honest, it hurts.

I know because I’ve lived it.

For a long time, I focused on who wasn’t there. I wondered why some relationships changed and why certain people seemed to disappear during the seasons when I needed them the most.

But as time went on, my perspective began to change.

I realized that not everyone knows how to walk beside someone who is grieving or going through a difficult season.

Sometimes people stay away because they don’t know what to say.

Sometimes life pulls them in different directions.

And sometimes relationships simply change.

That realization didn’t erase the disappointment, but it gave me grace.

It also helped me stop dwelling on who wasn’t there and start noticing the people who were.

Yesterday, we celebrated our daughter Ella’s heavenly birthday.

As you can imagine, it was an emotional day.

But in the middle of that day, something unexpected happened.

Two of my aunts reached out to me.

They took the time to remember Ella, and in doing so, they reminded me that I wasn’t alone.

The love they shared through their words meant more to me than they will probably ever know.

Their messages reminded me that God often sends encouragement through the people who simply choose to show up.

It wasn’t a grand gesture.

It didn’t take away my grief.

But it reminded me that love is often expressed in the smallest acts of kindness.

A thoughtful message.

A phone call.

A prayer.

Remembering someone’s loved one.

Simply saying, “I’m thinking about you.”

Those moments matter.

More than we sometimes realize.

I’ve also learned that gratitude has a way of softening disappointment.

When I stopped focusing on who wasn’t there, my heart slowly shifted toward being deeply grateful for the people who were.

That doesn’t mean the hurt disappeared.

It simply means gratitude made room for healing.

If you’re walking through a difficult season today, I want to encourage you not to overlook the people God has placed in your life.

They may not be the people you expected.

But they may be exactly who you need.

And if you’re wondering how you can encourage someone else, don’t underestimate the power of simply showing up.

You don’t have to have the perfect words.

You don’t have to solve their pain.

You don’t have to fix what is broken.

Just let them know they aren’t forgotten.

Sometimes that simple act becomes the encouragement they needed to keep going.

A Question for You

Has someone unexpectedly shown up for you during one of the hardest seasons of your life?

Take a moment today to thank them.

Tell them how much their kindness meant to you.

You may discover that your gratitude becomes an encouragement to them, just as their kindness was an encouragement to you.

Because sometimes…

The greatest gift we can give another person is simply our presence.

💛 A new normal is not the end of our story. It is simply the place where the next chapter begins.